Nanny 9-1-1

Okay, I am going to admit right now, lately I feel as though I stink at parenting.  I scream and yell all the time, even over silly little things like spilling water on the kitchen floor.  I don't stop and play or read to the kids like I used to.  And it's all showing!

I feel like I've completely lost control over my children.  They are all so hyper and active all day long and I just can't seem to keep up.  They don't respond to me anymore no matter how loud or soft my voice is.  I feel like I don't sound authoritative any more to them because I'm all they hear day in and day out.  If Jesse says something to them, they shape right up!  It's becoming very frustrating.

I'm also getting very frustrated with myself.  I know I can be a better parent than this.  I also know that I've ridden the "I'm exhausted from my life" train way too long. 

I know this is not okay and I need to bounce back into my parenting full force.  I just have to.

People keep telling me it's okay to be this way.  Or that I'm a good mother no matter what.  That I shouldn't be so hard on myself.  I've listened to them and blindly went along thinking I was doing a good job.  But I'm not!

I have considered writing to the Nanny 9-1-1 or SuperNanny shows.  I could really use some advice from someone who witnesses it all first hand.  Someone objective, probably not from friends or family...  They are usually bias or compare my situation to theirs.  I'm not a spanker or a yeller by nature, so I need to find parenting techniques that really work for me and the kids.  But, I truly believe my biggest problem is I used to be hands on and now I'm not.  I sit back and just "bark" orders out and no one listens.  Hands on definitely seems to be the better choice in our household.

Instead of always just saying that my kids come first, I need to get back to making them come first.  Even if I feel too tired to chase them around the playground or even go outside for that matter.  Even if one more piggy back ride seems just painful.  Even if I just sat down and hear a cry from the other room... I need to get up and deal with my life.

Starts today, period.

Hugs ~B.